"Helloo.. Amma, I have got my first job :). I got in the first company itself which came to college. Just now the results were announced and I wanted to tell you first. What happened amma? Are you not happy? Are you crying?"
"Helloo.. Amma.. How are you? Have you been eating properly?"
"Yes son.. But now I don't care all those things. My life is almost over. I am getting older. You tell. How are you?"
"I am ok amma. Lots of work. Quite busy nowadays. I will call you later"
"Ok then. Bye"
"Hello Achamma(Grandmother).."
"Yes son.. I have been eager to talk to you. It has been quite a long time. When will you come to see me?"
"I am not sure about when I would be coming. But I will come and meet you when I come for sure. How is your health?"
"My leg still pains. I am finding it very difficult to walk nowadays."
"Take care of your health achamma.Meet doc if possible.Don't do too much of work"
"Ok son. Now don't waste money. Sleep now"
"Ok achamme.. I will call later."
"Helloo Amma. I am having some work, so I may not be able to come for Onam"
"Is it so? Would you be coming anytime after that?"
"I can only come next month. There are no tickets also available"
"Your grandmother is sick. She was telling she wants to see you."
"I will see her next time when I come there"
"Ok son. Don't waste money in all these calls. Take care and bye".
"Hi son.. We are not having any celebration this time. Without you, what onam celebration?
It would have been good if you had come. Who knows if I would be there or not on next Onam"
"What are you talking amma? Don't talk like this. I will come there soon"
"Haan acha.. What happened? Didn't sleep till now? It is very late."
"Son.. Your grandmother passed away. She was asking if she can see you even the day before"....
I didn't know what to do. Its over and I can't redo the past anymore. I used to thing I will never repent in future for anything that I do. Now I am repenting this and I would repent this my whole life. I was not with her when she actually needed me. She loved me a lot and always wanted me to be with her.
Now, it is more than six years I have been working away from my house, now quite far that I will not be able to reach home even in one day. Sometimes my amma tells that she has not even seen me properly after I have grown up. She tells that after school, I had left home and then it is rare that she has seen me. My father sometimes asks if I can get some job nearby? I used to just hear that and then forget it. May be I was selfish.
As a person without any aim in my life, I had decided that I will at least try giving happiness to my near and dear ones. Wanted my parents to be happy.Till I got a job, I think I have tried my level best to do that. But after that, I don't know how things changed. Yes, I know my parents would be happy even now as I can look after myself now. But I am not very sure if they are really happy.
Something which was implicitly said many times was never understood by me. Any parents would want their children near them. But then, they cannot tell it to me. How can parents intentionally interfere in their kids future? It may be good for him that he works where he is presently. We cannot force him to leave his career for our happiness. But as a son, I should have understood that. It is not when they are young, they need us. It is when they are old, they need us. Till we were not self sustained, they were with us. Now, when they need us, we are nowhere near them. They depend on neighbors or others whom they don't even know. This was never my purpose.
Now I think what if I had avoided that software delivery and had gone to meet my grandmother??
But thinking is the only thing I can do and repent.
"Helloo.. Amma.. How are you? Have you been eating properly?"
"Yes son.. But now I don't care all those things. My life is almost over. I am getting older. You tell. How are you?"
"I am ok amma. Lots of work. Quite busy nowadays. I will call you later"
"Ok then. Bye"
"Hello Achamma(Grandmother).."
"Yes son.. I have been eager to talk to you. It has been quite a long time. When will you come to see me?"
"I am not sure about when I would be coming. But I will come and meet you when I come for sure. How is your health?"
"My leg still pains. I am finding it very difficult to walk nowadays."
"Take care of your health achamma.Meet doc if possible.Don't do too much of work"
"Ok son. Now don't waste money. Sleep now"
"Ok achamme.. I will call later."
"Helloo Amma. I am having some work, so I may not be able to come for Onam"
"Is it so? Would you be coming anytime after that?"
"I can only come next month. There are no tickets also available"
"Your grandmother is sick. She was telling she wants to see you."
"I will see her next time when I come there"
"Ok son. Don't waste money in all these calls. Take care and bye".
"Hi son.. We are not having any celebration this time. Without you, what onam celebration?
It would have been good if you had come. Who knows if I would be there or not on next Onam"
"What are you talking amma? Don't talk like this. I will come there soon"
"Haan acha.. What happened? Didn't sleep till now? It is very late."
"Son.. Your grandmother passed away. She was asking if she can see you even the day before"....
I didn't know what to do. Its over and I can't redo the past anymore. I used to thing I will never repent in future for anything that I do. Now I am repenting this and I would repent this my whole life. I was not with her when she actually needed me. She loved me a lot and always wanted me to be with her.
Now, it is more than six years I have been working away from my house, now quite far that I will not be able to reach home even in one day. Sometimes my amma tells that she has not even seen me properly after I have grown up. She tells that after school, I had left home and then it is rare that she has seen me. My father sometimes asks if I can get some job nearby? I used to just hear that and then forget it. May be I was selfish.
As a person without any aim in my life, I had decided that I will at least try giving happiness to my near and dear ones. Wanted my parents to be happy.Till I got a job, I think I have tried my level best to do that. But after that, I don't know how things changed. Yes, I know my parents would be happy even now as I can look after myself now. But I am not very sure if they are really happy.
Something which was implicitly said many times was never understood by me. Any parents would want their children near them. But then, they cannot tell it to me. How can parents intentionally interfere in their kids future? It may be good for him that he works where he is presently. We cannot force him to leave his career for our happiness. But as a son, I should have understood that. It is not when they are young, they need us. It is when they are old, they need us. Till we were not self sustained, they were with us. Now, when they need us, we are nowhere near them. They depend on neighbors or others whom they don't even know. This was never my purpose.
Now I think what if I had avoided that software delivery and had gone to meet my grandmother??
But thinking is the only thing I can do and repent.
